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Things You Should Never Say To a Latina

Want to party?

No smart Latina will want to party with a stranger?
Party = Sex in Latin speak.

latina-questionsCan we go back to your place?

Why is he so cheap, can’t or won’t spring for a motel room.

You sound just like mom.

What, he’s had sex with my mother? That slut…is what is going through her mind.

She’s so hot.

That bitch. Does she think she can steal my man? I’ll show him…

I’m not good enough for you

Tell her enough times that you’re not good enough for her and she’ll start to believe it

Your boobs have gotten bigger

Yeah, no thanks to you. My other guy bought them for me.

How much?

What, you think I’m a whore? But just so you know, it’s $100.

Do you love me?

Sure I love you, but you don’t start loosening your wallet, I am going to miss you a lot.

Are you married?

If I was, would I be talking to you.  (Transalation: yes, but that is not important.)