Comedian Dave Chappelle once famously held forth that there was no such thing as “premature” orgasms since, at least as far as he could tell, all of his orgasms showed up right on time. A quip that underscores your idea of “too fast” needs to be framed in terms of “for whom?”
For biological purposes, it is probably much more advantageous for the man to orgasm quickly, if breeding before getting killed by wild animals is the objective.
For those of us without wild-animal provisos, it usually makes sense to take our time with things we enjoy, but since I’m like the only sex-advice columnist in the world who won’t lie to you, I’ll tell you this: FTFJ is a real thing.
First-Time Fuck Jitters — or FTFJ, something well-studied that I created just now — have scuttled more evening plans than bad clams or no reservations at Bestia in LA. If your hookup was planned, there may be less of an excuse for it, but if the encounter was sudden and unplanned, your man might have been cut short and for sure is dealing with a mantra that’s the modern man’s mostly useful checklist: condoms, check; erection that stays long enough to put on aforementioned condom, erection that lasts long enough for you to have an orgasm, and all of this while not crashing the car.
Yes, to quote Tony Montana, it’s hard to be a man-g.
So is the issue his placement on top? Not necessarily. While I have heard anecdotal stuff about the erection-destroying power of this position, it wouldn’t be solely responsible for him orgasming quickly. Rather, his inability to control pacing on the bottom might be it, but all of his blood working against gravity could be it too.
My suggestion is to consider this a test. A good lover, if he orgasms first, makes with the oral until she does. A bad one high-fives himself and goes and gets a sandwich.
Also across the good lover-bad lover divide: A good lover will follow up this first fast one with a second, slower one. And not the next day, either, but eight minutes later.